Who Done it? Did the Brothers Really Sell Joseph?

by Rabbi Joel M. Finkelstein 

Sergeant at arms: His Honor, Judge_________. All rise. 

Judge: This court is in session. Mr. Prosecutor. 

Prosecutor: Ladies and gentlemen of the court, distinguished judge, members of the jury. We are gathered here today for a fascinating case, the greatest who done it Mystery in history. The question before  the jury is: who sold Joseph to Egypt as a slave? Was it the brothers as most people assume, and as I will prove to you conclusively, or was it someone else? I believe the evidence is clear. The brothers had the intent, the motive, and the will to kill their brother, and  they sheepishly and cruelly sold their own flesh and blood to slavery to once and for all rid themselves of their despised sibling or brother.  Thank you. 

Judge: Mr. Defendant. 

Defendant: Your honor, ladies and gentlemen. A grave injustice has been done. The whole world is convinced that my clients, the brothers of Joseph sold their little brother to slavery. Nothing could be farther from the truth.  Although the evil thought did cross their minds and they intended to do so, they were not at the seen of the crime and Joseph was actually stolen from the pit and sold to Egypt by a third party, either The Arab Ishmaelites or the Midianites. I will prove to you beyond the shadow of a doubt that the defendants are innocent. Thank you. 

Judge: The prosecution may call its first witness to the stand. 

Prosecutor: The prosecution calls Judah to take the stand. Judah, is it not true that you were the one to suggest that your poor little brother be sold? 

Judah: I was only trying to stop them from killing him. 

Prosecutor: Answer the question, please. 

Judah: Yes, it was my idea. (crowd: ooh, ahh) 

Prosec: Is it not true that the brothers listened to you and sold him to the passing Ishmaelites? 

Judah: No. They wanted to sell him, but after we sat down to eat lunch- 

Prosec.: You ate lunch while your brother was in a pit? 

Judah: Well, yes, actually we were quite hungry, and by the time we were through Joseph was gone. 

Prosec: Let me get this straight. You intended to sell him. You agreed to sell him. And then just out of the blue someone just happens to kidnap him while you weren't looking?! 

Defense: Objection. Judge: Overruled. Answer the question. Judah: That is correct. (audience- ahh, oooh) 

Prosecutor: NO further questions. (angry) 

Defense: I have no further questions. Judah's words speak for themselves. The Defense wishes to call Reuben to take the stand. (Reuven takes the stand) Reuben, is it not true that you did the best you could to save Joseph? 

Reuben: Yes, sir. 

Defense: Tell us please what happened when you came back to the pit. 

Reuben: I tried to save Joseph. I told them not to touch the boy, just to throw him in the pit. I intended to take the boy out and walk him back to Hebron myself. And believe me, that's no small walk. 

Defense: And what did you find when you arrived back at the pit? 

Reuben: He was gone. (crowd: ooh, ahhh) Defense: Let me get this straight. You threw him in the pit and when you came back to save him, he was gone. And where do you think he went? 

Prosec: Objection. Conjecture. 

Judge: Sustained. Do you have any further questions? 

Defense: NO. 

Prosecution: Reuven, I do have some questions. Where were you at the time of the sale? 

Reuven: Well,. I...I...I... 

Prosecution: Is it not true that you were suffering from deep emotional stress at the time and that you were depressed as a result of having humiliated yourself in the family by having moved some beds where you shouldn't have?! (crowd: ooh, ahhh) 

Reuven: Uh, well.... 

Prosecutor: No further questions. I would like to call Joseph to the stand. (crowd: ooh, ahh) Joseph, your majesty, if anyone can  solve this great mystery it should be you. You were  the one who was sold. You should be able to tell us who sold you. As a matter of fact, you already did tell us. When you revealed yourself to the brothers, you said, and I quote, chapter 45, verse 4: "I am Joseph whom you sold to Egypt." Now, what could be more clear than that? You did say that didn't you? 

Joseph: I did say that the brothers sold me to Egypt. (crowd: ooh, ooh) 

Prosec:  Why did you treat the brothers so badly when they first came to Egypt? You obviously believed that they sold you. No further questions. 

Defense: Joseph, did you not also say in ch. 40 verse 15 to the butler that you were, quote "stolen from the land of the Hebrews?"  Doesn't that mean that you were not sold by your brothers but were stolen from the pit? (crowd: ooh, ahh) 

Joseph: Well, I... 

Defense: Were you not a little upset, confused and angry when they threw you in a pit? 

Joseph: Well, I certainly was, wouldn't you be? 

Defense: Is it possible you were a little too upset to have remembered what happened? 

Prosecution: Objection?! Leading the witness. 

Judge: Objection sustained. 

Prosecution: Is it not possible that when speaking to some strange butler in jail, whom you wished to impress, you told him that you were stolen, but you were alone with your own brothers, you told them the plain and ugly truth that they sold you? 

Defense: I move that the witnesses' testimony be scratched from the record. 

Judge: We will take this into consideration. Closing arguments: 

Defense: I have shown that even the offended party, Joseph, said that he was stolen from Canaan, not sold. Do you really think the holy tribes of Israel would sell their own brother? Yes they talked about selling him, but would they actually do so? And even if they had the motivation and the will to sell him, they simply were not there. They were eating lunch and did not even witness the sale. I ask that the court find the defendants not guilty. 

Prosecutor: The brothers hated Joseph. He tattled on them, he was the favorite son, and he had a coat no one could have. They feared his dreams of ruling over them, and they wanted to make sure his dreams wouldn't come true. They sold him. Joseph said so himself. I rest my case. 

Judge: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it is now your job to decide. Weigh the evidence carefully. You may use only the evidence. Which is most compelling to you? And if you have even a slight doubt, do not find them guilty because the penalty for kidnapping and selling a brother is death. (crowd: ooh, ahh) So consider the evidence very carefully. Yours is a grave responsibility. (discussion ensues) 

Foreman of the Jury: After carefully weighing the evidence,  we find the brothers __________________, because ______________________________________________